Life Saving Music
There’s a question that author and Episcopal priest Barbara Brown Taylor asks in one of her books and it’s become a cornerstone to some of my strategies for keeping me grounded the last few years. She asks readers, “What’s one thing that’s saving your life right now?” If you’ve been around me in real life or on the socials for any amount of time, that question probably is pretty familiar to you by now. You’ll often hear me say “let me tell you what’s saving my life right now…” and it’s usually followed by some everyday thing that doesn’t seem particularly lifesaving. But here’s why I love that question.
Dancing Through the Lightning Strikes
The year 2021 was easily the hardest year our family has gone through to date. There are parts of that year that my brain has truly blocked out because they were so hard. It was the perfect storm of life, complicated by some very unexpected health news for me. All while still navigating our way through a global pandemic, etc. After I gave birth to our daughter in 2019, I had some bloodwork and other tests came back as irregular. I shrugged it off because 1. I did not have time to “deal with this” and 2. My body is really odd and will often show irregular bloodwork for truly no reason at all other than it is feeling persnickety that day. However, this was not the time to have shrugged it off…for 2 years.
In March of 2021 my OBGyn, who I trusted immensely, sat me down in her office after another round of tests and told me that I couldn’t keep ignoring the abnormal tests and bloodwork because I had developed stage 1 uterine and cervical cancer. Keep in mind in 2021, most doctor offices were still only letting the patient come in. My husband was not with me. It was just me and Dr. Capet and her nurse. I don’t remember walking out to my car. I do remember getting in and calling my husband and telling him the news. We had a day or so to talk about options and we both agreed that a hysterectomy was the best option…unfortunately, insurance did not. That’s a whole other issue for another day, but let’s just say I went 9 rounds with them and they won. So, after going through 2 procedures before they would cover the hysterectomy, we finally were able to schedule getting the bad stuff out in early July 2021. That surgery went well with some complications after but overall, was a success. The recovery was hard, not going to sugarcoat that. Our daughter was newly 2 and still loved cuddles and rocking for bed - none of which I could do independently for about 6 long weeks without someone lifting her up for me or her crawling up in my lap very carefully. Our son just knew Mommy had a big “boo boo” and had to be very careful when playing with him (sidenote: kicking a soccer ball 6 weeks post up is not a good idea).
Brooks & Dunn, San Antonio, TX
Down That Red Dirt Road
Almost exactly a year after my surgery, in 2022, Brooks & Dunn were putting on a concert in San Antonio and I was able to get tickets for my husband and I to go. Some sweet friends took our kids for the night, we got a hotel, and went and sang our hearts out. I remember that feeling right before they took the stage - the anticipation was so high, the energy and excitement palpable - I closed my eyes and just soaked it in. Was my life close to over with what I had gone through that previous summer? No. Did the experience shift some thinking and priorities for me? Absolutely.
Music was what helped me get up and get moving on days where it was so painful to do so. (And yes my family was too, Bridget, so unclutch your pearls, but music was also a huge part of my recovery). Between the summer of 2022 and spring of 2024 I was able to see Brooks & Dunn, Garth Freaking Brooks, Reba McEntire, Luke Combs, and some smaller artists like Kevin Fowler and some other local folks. At one point, I think it was my husband that asked me, “when did you become a concert person?” I think my answer was something along the lines of “when music started saving my life”. There are songs that will instantly transport me back to a moment in time. I can’t hear “Believe” by Brooks & Dunn without crying because it’s so full of soul and faith and reminds me of my grandfather; “Beautiful Crazy” by Luke Combs takes me back to countless moments in the car driving with my husband and him singing that word for word; “Hard Fought Hallelujah” by Brandon Lake and Jelly Roll reminds me of our son and how he knows every word to that song and any song by Jelly Roll. Our daughter sings along with anything and loves all music. She’s a lot like her Momma that way.
Luke Combs, Houston!
Everyone Deserves the Chance to Fly
Music has the power to change the mood in a room with the drop of a note. It can take you from feeling glum to joyful to reflective to just plain happy. Music is almost always one of the things that is saving my life…along with coffee, of course.
I looked at my Apple Music favorite songs and here’s a few of mine that have been on repeat the last few weeks. I could tell you a story about each and every one of them, but no one really has time for that. So for now, if you’re needing some new tunes, borrow some of mine. Friends, find something every day that’s saving your life right now.
Love you, mean it, friends.
Reba in Austin, TX!
JoEllen’s Current “Saving My Life Music Playlist”
Backup Plan by Bailey Zimmerman & Luke Combs
Defying Gravity by Arianna Grande & Cynthia Erivo
Opalite by Taylor Swift
Life of A Showgirl Taylor Swift/Sabrina Carpenter
Trailblazer Reba McEntire, Miranda Lambert, Lainey Wilson
Hard Fought Hallelujah by Jelly Roll/Brandon Lake
Getaway Car by Taylor Swift
The Dealer by Morgan Wallen & ERNEST
Cowgirls Don’t Cry by Brooks & Dunn
Believe by Brooks & Dunn
22 by Taylor Swift
Amazing Grace by Anne Wilson
Beautiful Crazy by Luke Combs